What do prisoners use to call each other?
Cell phones

How does an idiot call for his dog?
He puts two finger in his mouth and shouts "ROVER!"

What do you call when someone takes a lot of money and time to make a sleeveless jacket?

An inVESTment

I've shown this conversation to my pet bear...
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he finds this unbearable

@SovietSuperman_ why weren't russians always in a hurry?
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they were stalin'

Why is the sky blue?

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• A clear cloudless day-time sky is blue because molecules in the air scatter blue light from the sun more than they scatter red light. When we look towards the sun at sunset, we see red and orange colors because the blue light has been scattered out and away from the line of sight.

I try.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

[quote=52355:@jamlbon]Time to bust out my chemisty shit!]
I've always wanted to make a chemistry joke
why havent you made one?
because all the good ones argon

Watt is the unit for power[?]

@Everyone

why does cinderella suck at sports?
cuz she has a pumpkin for a coach and she runs away from the ball

You know, parallel lines have so much in common, it's a shame they'll never meet!